War

It is 2:56 AM right now & one of my very close friends is on his way to Afghanistan. He's a 19 year old, fearless, anxious soldier on his way to war. One of many. I know he's ready & I have so much respect for him. He's always been such a great friend. I recently saw him again for the first time in 4 years. Now it will be another year before I see him. Hopefully i'll get a letter from him in the next few months. In in the mean time, he's in my prayers as are all the brave men & women in the Military <3

Ever since I graduated, i've been trying to live every day to the fullest. The past few weeks have been filled with crazy adventures. I've done things I never thought i'd do (*cough* skinny dipping among them *cough*) & made many memories i'll always look back on & smile upon. But it hasn't been all fun & games. Every single time you think life is going good, something else is thrown your way. Another obstacle you have to over come.

Six months ago I fell in love with a Marine. He was everything i'd ever wanted & everything I thought i'd ever need. I spent an amazing weekend with him in February & afterwards he started training & preparing to deploy in March. Things started to go downhill shortly after. I never imagined it would have been anything like what it was and I was upset that he'd been keeping this from me for so long... but i'm going to be there for him & help him any way that I can. When he didn't get to deploy, he became depressed. It's hard because no one wants to see any one they care about struggling with any thing like this......I'm really not sure if we'll be together again, it's complicated. Love really is blind.

I'm going to bed.

God bless the troops <3

Inspiration

<" Summer time, I think, is a collective unconscious. We all remember the notes that made up the song of the ice cream man; we all know what it feels like to brand our thighs on a playground slide that's heated up like a knife in a fire; we all have lain on our backs with our eyes closed and our hearts beating across the surface of our lids, hoping that this day will stretch just a little longer than the last one, when in fact it's all going in the other direction."


I'm putting the last six months of my life behind me & looking to the future. I'm no longer a Marine girlfriend. I had to do what's best for me & by no means is this easy but it was necessary. I grew, learned,& experienced things with him that i'll never forget. I'll always have the memories we made together. Our time together was amazing but it's time to put it in the past & look to the future. In the end, some things just dont' work out. I plan to avoid Pisces from this point forward, haha. According to the Zodiac they are my worst match, yet there's just something about them, something irresistible that I fall for every time.


With every day that goes by, i'm learning something new about myself. When you are born & raised in the south you can try all you want to deny your roots but they eventually come shining through. My friends aren't going to believe this.... but i've even been listening to country music lately. What can I say...my sounthern side was hiding under the surface, bound to pop up sooner or later ;)


There's this one person in my life & he's my inspiration to be just who I am, myself. Ever since i've known this person, he's never tried to be someone he isn't which never fails to amaze me. He is genuinely, just...himself...I'm not sure he'll ever know how much of an impact he's made on my life. Everyone has their own inspiration to be themselves, well he's mine.

From now on, i'm going to try to just be myself & open up more. I'm going to try my damnedest to stop caring so much about what other's think. Life's short, so you gotta live it to the fullest, right? Do crazy things, don't be so up tight, have a good laugh. You're only young once.