Sunday, March 29, 2009


I can't help feeling so down and upset. :( I HATE THIS!! This week marks 8 very long since i've seen my Marine. We never get the chance to talk anymore and it's killing me being so damn distant and separated from him. How badly i just want to talk to him and hear his voice and see him....there's SO many things I want to talk to him about and ask him but we never get to talk anymore at all....

When I get upset sometimes the first thing I think about is texting him but I refuse to let him see my weakness shining through. I have to be strong for him, I can't let him know how much i'm hurting and how much I hate this :( how it kills me not to know anything and be so far away... not knowing if he'll get to come home soon.... i'm trying so hard to be strong but I hate this... it's killing me :( If i had the promise that he was coming home before he leaves then I could live with it... I would have something to look forward too... I try not to talk to him about any of this because I can't help feeling selfish when I do :(

Every day I wake up...go to school....sometimes work... keep myself as busy as possible....wondering if today will be the day I hear from him that he's coming home....I miss him so much it hurts.....I feel so weak....

1 comment:

  1. You're not weak, April. Never. You're just hurting and anxious, and that's to be expected. But don't let it get you down. You know that I'm here for you. If you need to just come to the house one day just to get away and talk, or just sit and watch TV, or even let out a good cry, you know I'm here and you know I'd NEVER judge you. ILY so much, beautiful. And I know you're gonna make it through, ok?